Me and Lance Armstrong

I'm getting a bit old for heroes but there are plenty of people I have admired in many walks of life, particularly sport. One of them was Lance Armstrong who confessed to doping this week.

One of the first things Armstrong said in his TV confession to Oprah Winfrey was: "I know the truth. The truth isn't what was out there."

As a fan of the X-Files I recognised the paraphrase in that statement. I'd like to add my own from that show, "I wanted to believe".

I wanted to believe that a man who'd been extremely ill with cancer might have taken the superhuman strength that he called on in battling that disease into the sporting arena to beat his opponents.

I wanted to believe that when he stormed up Luz Ardiden to win stage 15 of The Tour in 2003 (after falling through becoming tangled in a spectator's bag) it was because he was fuelled by anger and adrenalin. Not fuelled by EPO, blood doping cortisone etc.

I wanted to believe that the allegations against him were being made by disgruntled ex-employees with an axe to grind.

I wanted to believe in that statement from the Nike Ad - "I'm here on my bike busting my ass for six hours a day. What are you on?"

I wanted to believe he didn't answer the USADA allegations because he was tired of fighting them for all these years.

I was wrong. All I was believing in was "The Big Lie". Well done Lance, you got me. Hey ho.

I no longer believe in Lance Armstrong the cyclist. I'm not sure what I think of Lance Armstrong the inspiration to cancer patients or Lance Armstrong the philanthropist and cancer foundation founder.

But Lance Armstrong the author. Your book's going to the charity shop. Believe that.